*Wrote this back in January but didn't publish it before for some reason. Maybe I thought it was unfinished.*
In 2018, we submitted 23 proposals valued at $95.5 million. That's nearly two per month, and for much of the year I was the only dedicated business development person on staff. That is a lot of ad hoc team formation, coordination, and management, not to mention the writing, consultations, design workshops led, Of those we won four, valued at $7.4 million, and lost five, valued at $9.4 million. The remaining 16 proposals, worth $78.7 million, are pending. That doesn't include the stuff we submitted the year before that we're still waiting on, or the $80+ million worth of potential projects we're negotiating with a few different donors. And, you know, all the other things I'm responsible for: communications, monitoring and evaluation, gender, stakeholder engagement (which includes the odious task of planning visits for big muckity-mucks).
I try to keep a pretty modest view of my own competencies. On the plus side, I'm a good writer and editor. I'm personable and confident and I can run a meeting or chip in usefully to someone else's. I'm committed to inclusion and justice in the office and in our work, moreso perhaps than many of my colleagues. But I'm not super well organized, prone to procrastination, a well-liked but uncertain and probably too-passive manager (although I think I've improved a lot over the last two years), and at least slightly out of my depth on a couple of the key things my department is responsible for: monitoring and evaluation (about which I know the basics but am not super strong) and communications (about which I barely know even the basics, apart from being able to write well). Occasionally my procrastination and dislike of certain tasks means things slide that shouldn't. When we're not winning money, that negative stuff really sticks out and it's hard not to question or feel bad even about the parts of my job I think I'm good at.
So it's kind of nice to look back and realize that what I perceive as a lack of success last year isn't due to a lack of hard work or productivity. We really did bust our butts.
In 2018, we submitted 23 proposals valued at $95.5 million. That's nearly two per month, and for much of the year I was the only dedicated business development person on staff. That is a lot of ad hoc team formation, coordination, and management, not to mention the writing, consultations, design workshops led, Of those we won four, valued at $7.4 million, and lost five, valued at $9.4 million. The remaining 16 proposals, worth $78.7 million, are pending. That doesn't include the stuff we submitted the year before that we're still waiting on, or the $80+ million worth of potential projects we're negotiating with a few different donors. And, you know, all the other things I'm responsible for: communications, monitoring and evaluation, gender, stakeholder engagement (which includes the odious task of planning visits for big muckity-mucks).
I try to keep a pretty modest view of my own competencies. On the plus side, I'm a good writer and editor. I'm personable and confident and I can run a meeting or chip in usefully to someone else's. I'm committed to inclusion and justice in the office and in our work, moreso perhaps than many of my colleagues. But I'm not super well organized, prone to procrastination, a well-liked but uncertain and probably too-passive manager (although I think I've improved a lot over the last two years), and at least slightly out of my depth on a couple of the key things my department is responsible for: monitoring and evaluation (about which I know the basics but am not super strong) and communications (about which I barely know even the basics, apart from being able to write well). Occasionally my procrastination and dislike of certain tasks means things slide that shouldn't. When we're not winning money, that negative stuff really sticks out and it's hard not to question or feel bad even about the parts of my job I think I'm good at.
So it's kind of nice to look back and realize that what I perceive as a lack of success last year isn't due to a lack of hard work or productivity. We really did bust our butts.
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